Boost Your Job Search with the Buddy System
C.J. Hayden, MCC
Remember back in grade school when the teacher asked you to
hold hands with a friend on field trips? The idea behind the
buddy system is that it's much harder to get lost if there
are two of you traveling together. When you get into
trouble, your buddy can help you out, or find someone else
who can.
Maybe you could use a buddy in your job search. The constant
challenges you encounter while seeking out job opportunities
and going on interviews make job-seeking a difficult road to
travel all alone, and it's easy to get lost. Teaming up with
a job search buddy can give you:
Perspective - A different point of view on your progress or
challenges. Just hearing your problem restated by another
person can give you new insight that will help you find a
solution.
New Ideas - A partner for brainstorming and an extra pair of
eyes and ears to spot opportunities. You can double the
amount of knowledge and experience at your fingertips.
Accountability - Someone other than yourself to whom you are
accountable -- who will ask you once a week what you have
done so far, and what's next.
Support - Space to complain or celebrate out loud, with
someone who cares about your progress. If you're facing a
roadblock, grousing about it for a few minutes may be all
you need to get back into action. And having someone to
share your success with can make it much sweeter.
While you could use your spouse, best friend, or a co-worker
to provide this extra help, the individuals closest to you
may not be the best choice. The people in your personal life
will not always be thrilled with how much time you're
spending on looking for work, and your co-workers may tend
to sidetrack you with day-to-day job issues. You may find it
more helpful to find a buddy who can maintain some
detachment, but who also understands the importance of your
job search.
You and your buddy can assist each other in reaching your
goals by setting up a regular check-in, where each of you
reports on progress, announces successes, and describes
challenges. The buddy's job is to listen, celebrate,
commiserate, and be a brainstorming partner. Here's how to
make the buddy system work for you in job-seeking:
1. Set a fixed time to talk. Whether you meet by phone or in
person, set a start and end time for your conversation. Half
an hour is enough; an hour is plenty.
2. Check in about goals and action steps. Make a brief
report about where you are with your job search and what
steps you have taken since your last meeting. Keep your
check-in brief and to the point, e.g. "I got one interview
this week, and set up two appointments for networking
lunches. I revised my résumé to include more of my past
accomplishments, and applied for three new job openings."
Acknowledge your buddy's progress and celebrate his or her
success.
3. Help each other solve problems. Ask your buddy to first
just listen while you tell him or her what's going on and
clear your emotional reaction to it. Your buddy can say
things like, "Gee, that's tough," or "How awful!" but should
not offer any advice until you are through. Talk about not
only what is happening, but how it makes you feel. If it
sounds like complaining, that probably means you're doing it
right.
You might say something like this: "I've been trying for two
weeks to finish my résumé, and there's just been one
emergency after another, and now my mother wants me to help
sell her car, and I'm so frustrated! All the words I write
down just come out wrong, and I don't think it'll ever come
together, and I needed it yesterday, and I'm so worried
that..." You get the idea.
Set a time limit of 5 minutes for reporting and clearing. At
the end of that time, ask your buddy to summarize for you:
"I hear how frustrated and worried you are. You seem to have
two problems that need to be solved -- finding the time to
work on the résumé, and getting the words to come out right.
Are you ready to look at some solutions?"
4. Brainstorm possible solutions. Your buddy's job is not
necessarily to hand you the right answer -- his or her more
important role is to help you expand your thinking to come
up with some new ideas. Take your problems one at time, and
together with your buddy, make a list of possible solutions.
Don't edit the list as you are brainstorming; include
anything and everything that comes up. You are not allowed
to say, "That won't work," or "I already tried that."
Here are the potential results of a brainstorm on getting
the right words for a résumé:
- hire a résumé writer
- plagiarize my friend's résumé
- use the thesaurus
- ask my cousin the writer to help
- do a résumé with only pictures
- don't use a résumé at all
- look at sample résumés on the Internet
- take a class in how to write a résumé
- use what I have and stop worrying
- have some colleagues review it
5. Decide on your next steps. If none of the brainstormed
ideas seem right, look at each one to see if there's
something useful in it. Maybe you can't afford a résumé
writer, but you know one you could ask for a word or two of
free advice. Perhaps a class would take too long, but you
could check out a book from the library. Find just one thing
you can do that will get you moving toward a solution.
Regardless of any problems you try to solve during your
session, always end by naming what steps you will take on
your job search before your next meeting. Write these steps
down - both yours and your buddy's - so you can check in
about them next time.
6. Keep the relationship reciprocal. Make sure each of you
gets an equal amount of time at your meetings. If you end up
spending the whole session on one person's problem, devote
the next session to the other buddy. Keep your buddy in mind
as you make new discoveries and meet new people, and share
any opportunities you uncover. The buddy system works best
when you do for your buddy what you would like your buddy to
do for you.
Source: http://www.ArticlePros.com/author.php?C.J. Hayden
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