What Kind Of Shoes Do you Wear To A Beach Wedding?
By Charly Nguyen
With another Valentine’s Day come and gone, the American consumer consciousness turns toward the next phase in the annual series of holidays and special occasions- and the gifts that go along with them. For the engaged and for those wish to be, it’s time to prepare for wedding season! What’s that you ask? No it’s not too early. In fact, most any bridal planner will tell you that if you plan to get married this June you had better have booked the DJ last October.
For those of us who can’t afford the services of a personal bridal consultant, or who prefer the “let’s-do-it-ourselves,” method, there are many bridal and wedding websites available for pulling off a wedding with professional polish. Ranging in topic from unique ideas for the reception to appropriate wardrobe recommendations for the mother of the bride, the content of these bridal sites is designed to provide some preliminary ideas for the ceremony to the newly engaged, and spells out in step-by-step detail the practical components for those taking the plunge.
If you’ve ever thought about getting married, you’ve realized that this one day will mark and be remembered as the beginning of both your lives together- so it had better be monumental. Once a date is set, it’s time to plan your reception. Making your wedding memorable should be determined your personality as a couple and not by a budget or lack thereof.
While some “extreme” couples prefer to exchange vows while skydiving, or share that first kiss dangling from a bungee cord, the distinguishing feature of your ceremony should come from the both of you. For those of us that prefer to keep our cold feet on the ground, this can mean a distinctive theme for the reception, a non-conventional locale, or even an over the top period-inspired wardrobe.
First, ask yourself what about the two of you makes yours a special romance. Once you’ve brainstormed a bit and come up with some ideas, choose one that you both can agree on and highlight that in the ceremony. Some couples who have spent their courtship gazing at the New York skyline, for instance, choose to exchange their vows atop a skyscraper. Some others prefer to hold their nuptials on the sandy shores of an exotic paradise.
Planning for a wedding requires the input from both of you. This means goes from picking the reception hall to the florist and photographers. Remember, there are two of you walking down the aisle, and what could be a worse way to start a marriage than one partner grumblingly dragging their feet because they had no input into the decision-making process.
Once you’ve made the decision to decide together, you can begin to make a checklist of everything that you will need for the ceremony, as well as a budget so that you know how much you can afford to spend. You’re starting a new life together and, naturally, you’re going to need money. Be wary of wedding day extravagances - keep it tasteful, elegant, and within your price range.
Once you’ve figured out a budget and have a preliminary checklist you’re ready to begin planning the nuts and bolts of the ceremony. There’s so many websites that can help you plan your big day, but with so much information available it’s easy to get confused - how do you know who to listen to?
In addition to offering an online wedding planner, most bridal wedding websites provide forums and message boards for would-be brides and grooms to discuss everything from honeymoon destinations to poetry for the invitations. Brides and grooms often start blogs to record everything leading up to the day. The Internet allows couples to share advice, suggestions, photos and even video.
The ‘Weddings’ section of New York magazine online offers tips for creating a unique ceremony in one of four styles, ranging from the “Sandals and Daisies” wedding (which suggests Central Park’s Swedish Cottage and Shakespeare Garden as a possible venue) to the “Elegant Grown-Up Affair” (which suggests Columbia University’s Faculty House as a possible locale). The site also provides recommendations for apropos poetry and/or literature to be read at the event, as well as musical selections in keeping with your sense of style.
Brides.com determines your “wedding style” based on your responses to a personality quiz, and then makes recommendations based on your responses. After discovering my wedding style (“Faraway Bride”) the site presented me with an article on how to plan a beach wedding. While the idea of getting hitched on a beautiful beach is appealing, I’d have be sure to take residency rules for marriage into account. (some countries require you to stay for a number of days before you can be wed).
Brides.com also has a similar quiz that reveals the respondent’s “registry style” which, in my case, is “Practical & Non-Traditional,” so, the emphasis is on long-term planning. This site explained that I might consider registering with the U.S. Dept. of Housing and Urban Development’s Bridal Registry Program, which would allow my guests to contribute what they would’ve spent on a wedding gift toward a down payment on a new home. How many married couples do you think would have opted for this, if they had the chance to do it all over again?
Another website, manhattanbride.com, the online counterpart of the popular publication, provides ample suggestions for engaged couples. Their wedding planner service provides a guideline that starts approximately 6-12 months before the date of the ceremony, and consists of a step by step timeline that walks the couple through the entire process, from hiring the officiant (who should be chosen as far in advance as possible - priests and judges have schedules too) to confirming airport transportation for the honeymoon flight.
D Weddings.com provides an excellent “Frequently Asked Questions” page that explains, in detail, things like what to discuss when you meet with your officiant, or even what menu items will appease both your vegetarian friends from the East Village and your omnivorous friends from Texas. One particularly insightful comment that turned up on the D Weddings website referred to a common difficulty for many a soon-to-be-married couple: Since many of the couple’s friends and family have never met, how can the couple ensure that they will all socialize at the ceremony and reception? The website recommends that it’s a good idea to schedule a pre-wedding get together so that everyone will at least have met once before the big day, and to seat guests at the reception by common interests- and of course to get the conversation rolling yourself, like any good host.
TheKnot.com provides online tools for its members that consist of an online wedding checklist (like the one discussed earlier), a budget calculator, guest list tools, and a wedding website to keep your thoughts organized and your guests informed. The budget calculator is of particular value since all the couple has to do is enter their total budget for the event and it will automatically eliminate options well out of their price range, as well as tailor its recommendations to their tax-bracket.
Some of the most elegant and memorable ceremonies have been done on a budget, and once the two of you have decided on one, prepared your checklist, and made the stylistic decisions for your day, its time to set your plan into motion. Divvying up responsibilities between the both of you (and of course a few relatives, and close friends…and even the occasional hired professional) becomes necessary to ensure you’re getting the most done on the least amount of time. Try to maximize your planning by booking appointments that are physically located close to one another on the same day (but don’t overextend yourself either). By working together and dividing the responsibilities you’re laying the groundwork for a long and successful marriage. Trust and communication are the cornerstones of any successful relationship, and it’s important to keep this in mind while planning the day that will signify the most important relationship you will ever be a part of.
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