It leaves behind shattered dreams, failed hopes and broken homes in its wake. Life is never the same again.
A divorce is a divorce and there is no easy way out of it. Whether it is acrimonious, DIY or managed, it is full of negative feelings and heartaches. However, uncontested divorce is the best way to divorce. It offers a couple the chance to end their marriage quietly and with dignity. It cannot take away all the pain but it can definitely make the whole process simple and inexpensive.
There are many advantages to an uncontested divorce. The first and the foremost being the cost involved. It is an inexpensive way of getting divorced and any money saved from spending on the divorce process can be used to live on after the divorce or spent on the children.
Another benefit is that in case the level of conflict between the spouses is low, then uncontested divorce is a good way to keep it at that. It is also private as any disclosures about your private life and various negotiations done to reach an agreement do not become a matter of public record.
It works out for the couples who have the practical sense to stop fighting in order to minimise the cost incurred and stay in control and end the marriage in a private, dignified manner. Uncontested divorce may be the ideal way to end a marriage in most circumstances but there are circumstances when uncontested divorce is not such a good idea:
1. Domestic Violence: In cases of domestic violence or physical abuse where it is impossible for the victims to negotiate on a level platform with the perpetrator. In such cases there are all the chances of the victim getting intimidated by the abuser and not getting an equal or fair share of the deal. The victim in such cases needs to be represented by a separate lawyer and it is not possible to do so in context of an uncontested divorce.
2. Unwillingness of One Partner: When one partner wants a divorce and the other is adamant not even to discuss the issue. If one spouse is opposed to any discussions or negotiations regarding divorce and the other wants to go through with the process as quickly as possible, it is imperative that the unwilling partner be served with the process. The partner wanting to get divorced has to hire a solicitor and do it the hard way.
3. Ignorance Regarding the Law: At times one or both the partners are ignorant and unaware of the intricacies of divorce laws. They leave rationality aside and behave in an unreasonable or greedy manner, making it impossible to reach the agreement acceptable to both. This calls for separate attorneys to represent them and negotiate on their behalf to sort out the whole affair. As uncontested divorce allows for only one partner to be represented by a lawyer, it does not fit the situation.
4. Emotional Abuse: If there has been a history of mental and emotional abuse where one spouse is unable to stand his or her ground and negotiate successfully for equal rights, there is a need for a divorce lawyer to represent him or her. If one spouse fears that due to years of abuse he or she will give in to emotional blackmailing by the other and be forced to come to an agreement which might not be suited to their best interest, then uncontested divorce is a bad idea. It is important for a lawyer to negotiate for you and guide you.
Even in an uncontested divorce, it is important that the interests of both the spouses are taken care of. The law demands that both partners cannot be represented by a lawyer. After hiring a lawyer both partners decide on the key issues, negotiate and reach an agreement assisted by the lawyer. Unfortunately, only one partner gets to be represented by a lawyer. To be on an equal footing, it is ideal if the partner who is going to move out, will be financially weaker to take care of the kids gets to be represented by the lawyer .This partner also becomes the petitioner of divorce and the notice is served to the other spouse. Often, there is no need for the couple to attend court and divorce is quick to come through.
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie <a href="http://www.quickie-divorce.com">Divorce</a> see http://www.quickie-divorce.com
